Why I Don't Watch Christian TV
by Fred G. London
Right before Candie arrived home from
work, I was quickly reminded as to why I rarely watch
"Christian" Programs much any more. As I was perusing
the channels, I stumbled upon one of the Christian
networks, and lo and behold, it happened to have one
of its "bless me" ministries on the channel. If I
didn't have such a strong sense of consequences, I
think I would have put my foot right through that TV!
The hostess of the show was an attractive and well spoken
woman with a "dynamic" teaching ministry (they always are,
you know) with her guest, a man who looked about sixty. He
sported a sort of bad "Beatles" haircut, and I assume he
was a theological doctor as that was the title preceding
his name. Yes, he was a doctor all right, as in "quack"!
The hostess was pushing his book and his teachings,
The Seven Blessings of
Passover. Yes, you too can learn the secret (it's
always a secret, you know, and I wish they would keep it to
themselves) of how you can receive all seven blessings
which rightfully belong to you... if you can cough up the
$77.00! (If you only get three of the blessings, can you
get a discount?) The anointed huckstering was really
heating up to the expected, absurd crescendo:
And, that's not all!
Are these people, and the people who support their ministry, backslidden pot smokers who have gone back to their former habit? How do they keep a straight face? Think about this: peddling a book entitled, The Seven Blessings of Passover for a contribution of at least, (please underscore, "at least,") of, what else, the incredibly spiritually symbolic number of, count them, two 7's cleverly put together to form the amount of $77.00! Now, you really didn't think they would be satisfied with one 7, did you? And for that, they'll throw in a Two-Person Communion Traveling Set! Talk about strange "bedfellows"!
Oh, and to add to the ambiance of the program, this woman encourages prayer requests to be sent to her, whereby, she literally nails them to a wooden cross situated right behind her chair. She exhorts her listeners that when she receives their requests and she nails it to that wooden cross behind her, they should also consider their problems as being nailed to that cross, and as a result, they are no more! Imagine that, no more problems! These people must be Amillennial, since apparently to them the Kingdom of God is already here on earth! No more problems! No more subjection to a fallen world! Really? Let's take this "Name it, claim it, and frame it gospel" to its logical absurdity.
If we are no longer subject to such worldly problems, but only blessings here and now, then this is how life for believers in this age should be: Women shouldn't experience pain during childbirth, men shouldn't have to work by the sweat of their brow, and we should never die! Faith is one thing, fantasy is quite something else. It's eastern mysticism, gnosticism, and existentialism all wrapped into one. And why stop there? I imagine if Jesus would have had sufficient faith he would not have had to go to the Cross! This is "another gospel," "a doctrine of demons" as Paul described it. They use the term "faith" as if it were a magic word, like "abracadabra." Well, in reality, it isn't faith at all. It's greed!
Fred
P.S. I just had an idea. I think I can outdo these guys. Listen up! For a donation of only $10.00 you too can receive The Ten Plagues of Passover!
