The Children of Tyranny (Chapter 5):
Third and Final letter to John Morey -- A closed door, a
closed mind!
"He who shuts his ear to the cry of the poor will also cry himself and not be answered." Proverbs 21:13 (NAS)
The verse scrolled across the inner recesses of my mind as I finished reading John Morey's final letter to my appeal for assistance (see Chapter 4, John's reply to my appeal for reason).
I was not surprised, really, at his terse, stony-hearted reply. Though expecting it, I still was deeply disappointed -- not so much about my situation really, but because of the magnitude, the shear monstrosity of the blindness and the fear that had taken hold of John, for, if he could be compromised to "shut his ear to the cry of the poor", where would a person go within this group to find one man who would listen and stand up for the truth? To find one man who would be willing to question whether or not I had been fairly and justly treated? One man who would put his reputation on the line for the accused? If not John, there would not be so much as a chance that another would step forward! The finality of John's letter hammered home the virtual futility of appeal, for, if his mind was closed, so would be everyone else in the cult!
John was as strong and as forthright a man as I ever had known, yet something dark and sinister had taken from him his strength of character and his compassion for the downtrodden and his passion for the truth over his respect for man. If this could happen to John, I reasoned, there is not a man among the bunch that I could call on, for all would be even more afraid and less willing than John Morey to question the decisions and the actions of those who rule the group, who make the decisions for those who are deemed "the following". So, John's reply was my measure for how desperately enslaved and controlled this group I once called my Christian family had become under the leadership of Robert Grove, his sons, and, in the Fort Worth assembly, Thomas Edward Collins, whose charisma and overpowering personality Robert had harnessed in order to exercise control over others and to repress any who might begin to think critically.
So, the verse scrolled through my mind as I read John's second letter, reminding me that what John was doing to me would be done to him, also, if he dared so much as to listen and to contemplate the possibility of an injustice covered up by local leadership in their dealings with me and my son. Yes, he knew what would happen, for he had the occasion in times past to cry out only, as you've read in his first letter, to be ignored by many in the group while a few mad men tore at him from every side to defeat him and finally bring him under their control. We all saw this and none of us responded because we were afraid. And John knew, just as all who remain in the group knows, that when publicly scourged by this leadership, there would be no one in the group who would question, who would call for reason, who would say, "is this right?" For you see, just as John victimized me, he was once victimized himself, just as we all have been victimized and have victimized each other. It's what you learn to do in a dysfunctional family, besides keeping secrets from those outside the family, or the world at large. Hence, the verse -- it is something the group members have been conditioned to repeat often and because they "shut their ears to the poor", they set themselves up to be ignored when they, too, are abused by the men who rule the "family" we've all been conditioned to believe is "the Body of Christ". It's a vicious cycle. In the thirty some odd years I've been in the group it has always been that way and it has always troubled me, just as I know it troubles many there now.
But why don't they leave? That is a hard question to answer, at least for me, especially now as I have not been out of the group long enough to fully grasp the dynamics of the great hoax and seduction the group leaders have played on our minds.
Maybe it was the security. We all felt secure and cozy in our little, warm environment. The box, as I've come to think of it, with four plain walls, a top and a bottom, with no windows or doors to the outside world. Someone speaking to us for God while we were too busy with our jobs, raising children, and going... going... going to activities arranged for us by the leaders.
We were often so busy we had no time to study God's Word for ourselves and when we complained that we would like a little time to rest and to read or to just be with our families, we were shamed from the pulpit for being inconsiderate of the rest of the "family", for encouraging others by our example to miss meetings and activities, for we were not, as it is stated in Hebrews 10:25, to forsake "... the assembling of ourselves together... and so much the more... " in the latter days in which we were living. In other words, we were to be at all meetings and group activities because that's what the Word of God said. It made no matter whether it was every single night or not. We were expected to be there because, as Christians, that was our duty!
To do anything less was an outward sign of our carnal and rebellious hearts, which, leadership said, would eventually have to be dealt with in a very public way! And none of us wanted to be exposed in that way to a whole congregation of men, women, children, and especially, our very own children and our wives, and strangers, if there happened to be some there at the time of our verbal scourging! It was just too horrible a thought, too horrible a humiliation, and it served to ultimately breakdown the good feelings one should have about his father or mother and the family to which they belonged! And, often, because of it, a family would totally disintegrate, but it was never leadership's fault. The fault was the father. The fault was the mother, the son, or the daughter. But it was never leadership's! It was as if they could never err, for it was God's disciplinary work they were doing. And to complain against them was the same as complaining against God, Himself!
When one missed a meeting we all felt compelled to ask him or her why, thereby placing shame on the person and bringing their dedication to Christ and the group into question. What a guilt trip we all learned to place on each other at such times! And our group leaders!? My! How they lent their support and stirred to a frenzy the guilt we all laid on each other for missing just one meeting, just one activity, just one get-together of the many we were compelled to attend weekly and, especially, Fridays, Saturdays, Sundays, and virtually all holidays. We had little or no time to ourselves or with our families unless we were willing to face the humiliating, insinuating questioning by group members and the leadership about why we weren't there and then "love bombed" with how we were so severely missed. It was a double whammy of guilt, like being blasted by a double barrel shotgun loaded with slugs of shame and of feigned love!
And you say, "why would you stay in something like that!" It seemed like the right thing at the time. There were many good things, too. And there was the security. I guess we gave up our freedom for security. And because we didn't have time to get to know God's Word on a personal basis, we didn't have enough knowledge to know we were in a dysfunctional Christian family. We just accepted that's the way things were and that there were those who were "approved of God" who would know how we should behave ourselves in this group we all called "the family" or "the Church which is Christ's Body" or "the Body of Christ".
Yes, we were duped! We stayed because we were made to fear what lay beyond our little group -- the world at large. And we were threatened with being thrown out into this terrifying world if we didn't obey the group leadership. These factors -- I don't pretend to understand the dynamics of how all of this works, I just know it does and I am looking for answers because I do want to know so I can warn those caught in an oppressive system like this -- but, it was these factors that combined to constrain us and to drive us back into the clutches of the group whenever we might question the validity of what we as a group were doing.
And leadership, true to itself, took to task it's duty to keep us there and under their ever present watch, like the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah who were only concerned about getting back from Abraham the souls they'd lost when their twin cities were sacked and burned by enemies from the north. The souls! That's all they wanted! That's all they were concerned about! Just like Satan! Our souls!
That's how John Morey was being used in his letter to me. He wasn't the least bit concerned about whether I had been treated justly or unjustly. No, only that I was making accusations against leadership, which he referred to as "the brethren". He wasn't the least concerned that I could be right or even wrong in principle, for there is only wrong when one questions "the brethren", when one does not do what "the brethren" tells him to do whether their command produces good or bad results.
The duty of a "follower" is to do the bidding of the "leadership", nothing else and regardless of the outcome, even if its turning away a helpless, hungry soul on a cold winter night and telling him to go sleep under a bridge or in a shelter somewhere! It doesn't matter if it's one of your very own children! You must do what leadership says with regard to them or face public scourging and excommunication and shunning by friends and family! For to do leadership's bidding is the same as doing God's supreme will! Can you imagine the arrogance, the audacity, the total hypocrisy? The consummate cruelty and deception! Obviously the craft and cunning of a superior intelligence adversarial to the spirit of Christ! Adversarial to God, Himself! A vile creature who puts a spin on the very Word of God and who is working desperately in the hearts and minds of those who would be first among the children of God, who would rule as oppose to simply being brothers that consider each other and the helpless -- showing mercy and receiving mercy!
In truth, I don't hold John Morey responsible for what he wrote to me, as he was a mere vessel used by another to load me up with guilt, to discredit my person, to suggest that I am against God because I questioned "the brethren", to say that I brought "the brethren's" judgment upon myself, that I will answer to God for "charges against" God's "ministers, that I "would be the last one that God would call forth to correct his ministers, especially after looking at your track record over the years."
No! John couldn't write stuff like this, couched this way. The John I once knew wouldn't write stuff like this, couched this way! This was an inside job. From within John. An adversarial and condemning spiritual being controlling John's mind and accusing through him his own dear brother-in-Christ. Like the "leaders" who have victimized and traumatized John into submission to their will, John was attempting to do the same to me. He was subdued by having his past sins and failures hammered into him. Now, by hammering me with my past sins and failures, he had hoped to reduce me to a miserable, trembling, self-degrading bootlicker who hadn't the spiritual strength of conviction to suffer persecution or to endure the insults or false accusations for what is right -- showing mercy to the helpless. But, you see, John had me figured wrong because I am willing to suffer wrongfully for what is so apparently right and just! Even if I am the only one in a multitude! Why? Because that's what Christ would do and that's what He would desire from those who walk after Him in discipleship.
In his right mind, John Morey would not write such things! John Morey did not write those kinds of things before he was conquered. There is only one person that could and would write those things and that person is as much a spirit as Christ is a spirit today, only everything he does is against the spirit of Christ. He is anti-Christ! Accuser and destroyer of Christians everywhere! This is who wrote the letters to me as far as I'm concerned. And because of this, and for John's sake and the sake of many who have been subdued by this vile spirit, I know it is not really me they are persecuting and saying all kinds of evil against, but Christ in me! It is He who is truly being persecuted and spoken evil of. Not me! And, if Christ can forgive them, can forgive John Morey, so can I! And I have! And I will!
But I am also reminded that I must give an answer as much as possible of the hope that is within me, that this is a battle and I am a warrior, a priest and a king for God through the work of Christ upon the cross and that I have brothers and sisters, who likewise are priests and kings of God, but who are ensnared by the devil and are in desperate need of deliverance. It is my hope that God perchance will through me deliver them from the clutches of our dreadful enemy, Satan. For Satan has poisoned their minds with a deceitful and hateful doctrine that appears Godly, but it denies the power of God and the freedom He's given each and everyone who's called on the name of Christ to come directly to the throne of grace for mercy, forgiveness, and instruction in righteous behavior. Christ is our leader; not man, not Satan. Christ is also our friend as can man be also, but not Satan. And it is God who is the only ruler, the only King the redeemed should glorify. None other!
So it was with this in mind that I took up my pen and wrote this final letter to John Morey. My hope being that I would plant some seed within his mind that would at some point in time take root and begin to grow and flourish and eventually challenge and displace the darkness that now rules his inner self. He has long since received this letter and still remains silent. My prayer is that his thoughts are troubled and that eventually his eyes will be opened to the truth of our freedom in Christ as mine have been. Once your eyes have been opened, it's impossible to go back to being blind, even if, for the sake of peace and harmony you would want to. But I tell you, it is better to be hated than to be blind. I have yet to meet a blind man who wouldn't give his life for the pleasure of sight even if it were for a fleeting moment.
The letter is in two parts. At first I thought I would write a brief reply to John's final letter to me. However, after some thought, I felt I should attach a Post Script, which turned out to be much longer than the letter. The Post Script also contained a cartoon, the purpose of which was to make a visual impact that would convey in a powerful way a multitude of words could not.
Here's my final letter to John Morey. It was written September 28th, 2003 --
Dear Brother John,
Thank you for your reply. I understand your fear and your reluctance to help me as, indeed, I am a mere speck in an ocean of behemoths and it is no great honor to deliver a speck when a behemoth can be caught.
Though I may be the last whose issues you would consider, perhaps, the Lord will bring it to the forefront of His agenda. Since you have closed the door to me, then I take my issue before the throne of grace where we know the cries of a poor man are heard continually. And, as you've declined my cries for help, then deliverance must come through some other avenue, which, I am confident, the Lord Himself will provide.
I will not conclude this letter with verses as, indeed, anyone can through association with a scripture verse present an appearance of pious authority on a given subject when, in fact, the verse may be totally irrelevant to the subject for which it is produced.
I am not interested in looking authoritative. I just want there to be a solution that will both vindicate the injustice I've suffered at the hands of a few men and glorify Christ. I am just a common man and I wish to live a common life. I have no desire to lead anybody other than to fulfill my duties as a husband and father, and, conversely, I do not wish to be driven where I am not prepared to go.
However, I will offer you my farewell and ask that you at least pray for a solution to the issues surrounding me and my son that will glorify our Heavenly Father.
I remain yet,
Your friend and brother,
Richard Hudson
P.S. >> I do not dislike Tom Collins. But, I do dislike the way he operates. I have not done anything to him that I said I wouldn't do as a result of the fraud he perpetrated on me. Believe me, I could do far worse to Tom's reputation in the community and his workplace through my long time connections and experience with the media and Tom should know that because I employed it effectively to help Modesto's cause against the DA's office. My restraint toward hurting Tom's self-image has been far greater than his has been toward me. I am willing to sheath the sword, but only once a fair trial is established where we both may present our cases to a jury of unbiased peers.
Tom has already told me that unless I confess to his satisfaction to wrongdoing in this case with my son Dana, he will see to it that I will not again be permitted into the assembly and my children will be encouraged to withhold themselves and my grandchildren from me. In short, he wants me to take the knee, not because I am wrong in exercising my duty as a father, but because I embarrassed him before the assembly by not unreservedly obeying him as he expects of everyone. And, Tom, as I've come to learn over the years is a covertly vindictive man, especially toward those who demean the image he has of himself and which he chooses to convey to the public at large. If you don't obey Tom, it is an affront to his supper ego -- a sin for which he will make you pay.
He had that opportunity to get my cooperation, but he chose not to include me in his dealings with my son, just to accept without question, which he knew I would not do, and he brushed aside a scriptural response I gave to him for supporting my actions with my son. I immediately realized that the reason he so abruptly brushed aside the scripture was because he knew the scripture supported me and the only answer he could give to refute it was that it didn't apply today because it was some "Jewish parable".
Witness to this was Jack Hobson, Bill Amyett, and Jeff Grove, though I don't expect Jeff to admit as such, for it is Tom's job that he so obviously covets and whose approval he so desperately seeks. And poor Jack, in his situation with Modesto, owes Tom Collins who has made him totally dependent on him for decisions so that his good judgment is compromised. That leaves Bill Amyett, whom I love dearly and who has been toward me most loving and the most understanding. Yet he, too, like I have been and others among us, is caught up in Tom's spell.
Tom is unquestionably a most talented man, but what you see, what he presents to you is not what he really is. He is a crack deceiver par excellent and proof of this can be substantiated, but not before the appropriate time and in the appropriate place. Because, once Tom intercepts a complaint against him he disarms the complaint with cleverness and discredits the complainer whom he targets for punishment through third parties until the complainer recants and repents. This is a terrible thing, my dear brother, and I wish it were not true. But it is and it is the reason I am where I'm at and why you and others view me as you do.
I cannot recant and I cannot repent unless I lie to myself, to everyone else, and to God. Do you see the dilemma, my dear brother? I am in a Catch 22, a trap, and cannot extricate myself without the help of someone who is willing to step forward at the risk of their own security and reputation to advocate for me, to perform an investigation, to expose a doctrinal error regarding the application of authority and leadership among us (illustrated pictorially in the attached page and using actual, self-condemning quotes from those characterized in the cartoon.)
I cannot blame anyone for refusing, as I fully understand the difficulty and the risks involved. And I do not want to see anyone else hurt. But if no one steps forward, if no one is willing to ask questions and to demand answers and corrections, many will suffer and many will eventually turn away discouraged as some have already. And, if you wish to mark anything about me, my dear brother, you can mark that because it will come to pass in due time if there is no exposure and corrections aren't forthcoming; for, the signs are present -- the cracks are yawning, an eruption appears imminent! - REH
IS THIS TRUE? -- If we
obediently do what one in authority directs us to
do, then the one in authority is responsible before God for
what is done."
(from Authority, Order & Motivation, by Robert
Harrison, Virginia)
THINK AGAIN! -- James 4:17
holds each of us accountable for our actions
regardless of the motivator.
In the next episode, you will learn more about the men whom John Morey carbon copied in his letters to me. These men all share a common experience, which binds them to Robert Grove. The circumstances surrounding their experience may differ somewhat, but the processes of the experience itself are identical and have served to make these men dedicated to Robert Grove's doctrinal ideology in a most remarkable and deadly way.
I have received e-mails and some traditional letters from many who have been following my story. Thank you for your kind words, encouragement, questions, and valuable suggestions. For those who have asked me what I think the answer is or how it will come about, all I can tell you is I don't know. I assure you, however, that I am encouraged by Proverbs 21:22 -- "One wise person went up against a city of warriors and brought down the stronghold in which they trusted." These men trust in "the brethren". I trust in the Lord. I suspect the "wise person" in the Proverb trusted in the Lord also, otherwise he would not have brought down the stronghold.
Finally, Proverbs 21:31 reminds me that "the horse is made ready for the day of battle, but the victory belongs to the Lord." It's for this reason I am at peace in this battle. The victory belongs to the Lord. It's already been decided. I will continue to make ready with this ever in my mind.
Thank you for all who've reminded me that their prayers are with me. I know there are others whom I've not spoken to who also are lifting me up in prayer. I am deeply grateful.
Any who can, please write me. It encourages me greatly.
Richard Hudson
July 12th, 2004
